Sunday, April 30, 2006

A Belated Announcement

Despite my earlier reservations about potentially cheapening the inherent value of the whole event by wrapping it into a blog entry, I have finally succumbed to the pressure and am willing to go through with it. Though most of you already know, with the exception of those people who are randomly searching for the phrase "Taiwan+Club+Foot+Wrestling" and happen to run across this page,

Ariel and I are engaged.

Admittedly, it's a little strange to put that in print like this but what can you do. So really all that's left to for us to do is work out the little matter of planning a wedding in Italy. Needless to say, the next few months will be interesting.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Colin vs. Xinguang's Stairwell

So, I've deceided to make this post interactive. In order to give you an idea of what it's like to run up the second tallest building in Taibei without actually having to go up. To achieve this, you need to gather a few things: a plastic bag, a rubber band, and a copy of Jane Fonda's workout record.

All set?

Okay, first thing, put the plastic bag over your head and secure it with the rubber band. It is essential to this process that you allow as little air into your bady as possible. Good. Once the bag is secure, starting spinning around and around. The desire effect should be acheived in 3-4 minutes. Now you're ready to begin. Have a friend start the record on 78 and keep tempo with the chimpmunk-esque squeeking coming from the speakers. Upon completing, Side A remove bag and collapse.

Needless to say, I do not have a future as a professional, or semi-professional, stair runner.

The Xinguang Stair Climb was a reminder that sometimes, random impulse is not the best way to inform decisions. I guess it serves me right.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

The Best of March

Okay..... a month's a bit long. Sorry for being a negligent blogger. To atone for this, I going to give you all a brief synopsis of the highs and lows of March.

1. Ran in the Nike expressway Half-Marathon. Yes, I got up at 3:30 to run 10.5 Km out to a cone and then back on an empty road. I think I may have been the fastest male foreigner in my age group [there were four of us]. The race in two words: Bleeding nipples.

2. I almost got evicted for standing up for my academic ethics. Apparently my landlord's conceptions of editing and willful disregard for academic intergrity are closely aligned.

3. With each passing day I have become increasingly enamored with the furry lobster.

4. It was Carambola [Starfruit] season, I have probably eaten enough to kill a Shetland Pony.

5. Signed up for a race up the Xinguang Department Building before genuinely considering what I was getting myself into. 46 floors doesn't seem like too much on paper.... We'll see how I fair after Saturday.

6. Started my new class with the highly innocuous title "News and Views." Thus far, the text [which is still in its trial phase] has yet to establish a clear pattern. To highlight this lack of cohesion, Chapter 4 "The Charm of Television Shopping" seamlessly elides into Chapter 5 "Euthanasia." Well... perhaps there is some connection.

7. It's finally T-shirt season at the night markets and true to form, many of them are delightfully unintelligible. Those that are coherent still have a certain charm. Last weekend, Ariel and I came across a shirt with a monkey holding a guitar. At the bottom of the shirt was a brief description of this monkey. [The first two lines are a paraphrase but the last one is word for word]
This monkey has certain powers.
Helping you achieve the goal.
Secret Function.
Yes, we all covet monkeys with secret functions.
So, that's the gist of March, I'll see what I can do to keep up with April.